Coral Care content is reviewed and approved by our clinical professionals so you you know you're getting verified advice.
Find effective support for developmental delays, quickly.
Concerned about your child's development?
Our free screener offers guidance and connects you with the right providers to support your child's journey.
I see this question from two perspectives: as a parent of young kids, and as the CEO of a child development company working closely with occupational therapists, speech therapists, and developmental specialists every day.
At home, I regularly take my kids to the library. We check out science books, animal books, and books full of strange, wonderful fun facts. We flip through pages, use the index, and sometimes come up empty-handed. That process matters to me.
Not because I’m anti-technology, but because I want my kids to learn how to search for information, not just how to receive it.
The world our kids are entering is very different from the one we grew up in, and it requires a more intentional approach.
The World Our Kids Are Growing Up In Is Instant
Today’s kids have access to immediate answers. Google, voice assistants, and now AI can respond faster than a child can finish a question. That speed can be helpful, but developmentally, it changes how kids experience curiosity, uncertainty, and learning.
The scariest thing about AI isn’t just that it can be wrong. It’s how convincingly it mimics reality.
For kids whose brains are still developing the ability to evaluate sources, tone, and truth, something that sounds confident can feel true. That makes it essential that we don’t simply hand kids these tools without guidance.
Instead of asking whether kids should use AI or search tools, the better question is how to teach them to use them in age-appropriate ways.
Age-Appropriate Ways to Teach Kids How to Find Answers
Preschool Age: Wonder Comes First
For preschoolers, this is about building comfort with not knowing.
At this age, the goal isn’t research. It’s curiosity, imagination, and conversation. When kids ask questions, we can wonder with them out loud. We can say, “I’m not sure. What do you think?” or “Let’s look for a book about that.”
Books, pictures, play, and real-world experiences help young kids learn that questions don’t always have immediate answers and that curiosity is enjoyable. This stage lays the foundation for frustration tolerance and emotional regulation.
Ages 6–10: Learning How to Search
This is where we actively teach kids how to look for information.
Libraries become especially powerful at this age. Kids can learn how books are organized, how to use an index, how to skim for relevant information, and how to ask a librarian for help. These skills build confidence and independence.
Technology can be introduced here as a tool, not a shortcut. We might look something up together online after making guesses first or compare what a book says with what a search result says. This helps kids learn that information comes from different sources and that not all answers are equal.
Ages 12–16: Trust, Judgment, and Critical Thinking
For tweens and teens, the focus shifts to discernment.
This is when conversations about AI, algorithms, and misinformation matter most. Teens need help understanding that AI can sound authoritative without being accurate, and that confidence does not equal truth.
We can talk openly about how these tools work, what they’re good at, and where they fall short. Encouraging teens to question sources, verify information, and reflect before accepting answers helps them develop judgment and trust in their own thinking.
Frustration Tolerance: Why Struggle Is Part of Healthy Development
From a child development perspective, frustration tolerance is one of the most critical skills kids build, and one of the easiest to undermine with instant answers.
When kids don’t immediately know something, their nervous system has to stay regulated long enough to sit with uncertainty. That might look like guessing, trying again, asking a follow-up question, or deciding to come back to the problem later.
Those moments are not obstacles to learning. They are the learning.
When technology removes the pause between question and answer, kids miss repeated opportunities to practice:
- Staying engaged when something feels hard
- Managing the discomfort of not knowing
- Persisting without immediate reassurance
- Trusting that effort leads somewhere
Over time, this impacts how kids approach challenges more broadly. Kids with stronger frustration tolerance are more likely to try, fail, recover, and try again. Kids who expect instant resolution are more likely to shut down, avoid, or rely on external fixes.
Allowing kids to experience manageable frustration, with support, builds emotional resilience that carries far beyond academics.
Creativity: Support Tool or Creative Shortcut?
Creativity is another area where AI can be both helpful and harmful.
Creativity doesn’t emerge from fully formed answers. It comes from open-ended thinking, unfinished ideas, boredom, and experimentation. Kids need space to imagine, to be wrong, to revise, and to sit with half-formed thoughts.
When AI generates ideas instantly, it can short-circuit that process. Kids may produce something faster, but they may create less of their own.
At the same time, when used intentionally, these tools can support creativity. They can help kids brainstorm, explore new topics, or see alternative perspectives. The key difference is whether the tool is expanding the child’s thinking or replacing it.
A helpful guideline is this: Is the child still doing the cognitive work?
When kids are encouraged to come up with ideas first, reflect on what a tool offers, and make choices about what fits or doesn’t, creativity is strengthened rather than diminished.
Teaching Kids What to Trust in a World That Blurs Reality
Perhaps the most important lesson we can teach is how to evaluate what’s real.
This doesn’t come from fear-based warnings. It comes from modeling curiosity and skepticism side by side. Saying things like, “That sounds confident, but let’s double-check,” or “Where do you think that information came from?” teaches kids that questioning is normal and healthy.
As both a parent and the CEO of a child development company, I don’t believe the answer is avoidance. It’s guidance.
Technology isn’t the enemy. The goal is raising kids who understand it, question it, and don’t rely on it to replace their own thinking.
That’s why we still go to the library.
That’s why we still open books.
And that’s why I sometimes respond to my kids’ questions with, “What do you think first?”
Because learning how to think will always matter more than having the fastest answer.
